leashy loo 30/01/2023
this'll be the day that i die
Estava com expectativas extremamente altas para esse livro, e ele alcançou quase todas.
A escrita do Adam Silvera é incrível e flui super bem, e apesar de ter adorado o desenvolvimento pessoal dos personagens ao longo da história, o desenrolar do romance entre Rufus e Mateo deixou um pouco a desejar, e esperava por um desfecho um pouco mais trabalhado.
Vou explicar o porquê: durante o decorrer do livro, o Mateo e o Rufus desenvolveram uma conexão linda, e claramente passaram a se amar, mas em meu ver, foi algo platônico. Quando o livro chegou em 80%, o autor apenas jogou um romance entre os dois, e apesar de achar que eles combinam para caramba, parece que o narrador simplesmente ?esqueceu? de mencionar que os dois protagonistas estavam pensando um no outro daquele jeito durante a maior parte da história.
Sobre o desfecho: sei que o final ficou claro desde o começo, mas realmente esperava por mais detalhes sobre o fim do Rufus, da Delilah, do Victor e até um comentário final da Lidia ou dos Plutos. Talvez até um posfácio, em que o pai do Mateo acorda e lê os bilhetes deixados para ele. Acho que isso teria dado um sentimento melhor de conclusão. Mas isso é um capricho meu.
Tirando esses dois pontos, não tenho o que reclamar: o livro é perfeito, me fez refletir muito sobre a vida e a morte, e me deixou nostálgica e mal ao mesmo tempo (infelizmente não chegou a me fazer chorar? mas msm assim é bom!!).
Um ponto que me fez amar o universo do livro é que o autor colocou capítulos no pov de vários personagens, alguns que foram apenas mencionados na história principal, e fez uma conexão incrível entre várias trajetórias de pessoas completamente diferentes. Cada detalhe teve uma ligação com algo, e eu simplesmente amei isso.
Enfim, eu realmente amei esse livro, e com certeza recomendo muito!!!!
**vou deixar as minhas frases favs aqui para registrar:
"It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live."
"Twelve hours ago I received the phone call telling me I?m going to die today, and I?m more alive now than I was then."
"Life isn't meant to be lived alone. Neither are end days."
"that love is a superpower we all have, but it's not always a superpower i'd be able to control. especially as i get older. sometimes it'll go crazy and i shouldn't be scared if my power hits someone i'm not expecting it to."
"Maybe it's better to have gotten it right and been happy for one day instead of living a lifetime of wrongs."
"What am I going to do without you?"
This loaded question is the reason I didn't want anyone to know I was dying. There are questions I can't answer. I cannot tell you how you will survive without me. I cannot tell you how to mourn me. I cannot convince you to not feel guilty if you forget the anniversary of my death, or if you realize days or weeks or months have gone by without thinking about me.
I just want you to live.
"I guess I could call this energy freedom. No one will be around to judge me tomorrow. No one will send messages to friends about the lame kid who had no rhythm. And in this moment, how stupid it was to care hits me like a punch to the face. I wasted time and missed fun because I cared about the wrong things."
MATEO X RUFUS
?If you need to snap again, I?m here. Last Friends for life.?
"we did a lot of living today"
"But maybe this is how it was always written in stone or the stars or whatever: Two dudes meet. They fall for each other. They die".
"That's not our story." Mateo squeezes my hands. "We're not dying because of love. We were going to die today, no matter what. You didn't just keep me alive, you made me live." He climbs into my lap, bringing us closer. He climbs into my lap, bringing us closer. He hugs me so hard his heart is beating against my chest. I bet he feels mine. "Two dudes met. They fell in love. They lived. That's our story."
I like being visible this time. ?The time of my life, Rufus,? I say. ?I?m having it. Right now.? ?Me too, dude. Thanks for reaching out to me over Last Friend,? Rufus says. ?Thanks for being the best Last Friend a closet case could ask for.?
I want us to have history, something longer than the small window of time were actually sharing, with an even longer future, but the dying elephant in the room crushes me.
i kiss the guy who brought me to life on the day we're going to die.
PLUTOS
Malcolm stares out the window, wishing he could glimpse Rufus on his bike turning a corner, and finally he cries, these loud, stuttering sobs, not because he?ll now have a criminal record, not because he?s scared to go to the police station, not even because Rufus is dying, but because the biggest crime of all tonight was not being able to hug his best friend goodbye.
"Whatever happens to me, scatter me to Althea. Orbit each other so damn hard. I love you."
You may be born into a family, but you walk into friendships. Some you'll discover you should put behind you. Others are worth every risk. The three friends hug, a planet missing from their Pluto Solar System - but never forgotten.
LIDIA
?You?re supposed to be with me forever,? Lidia cries. ?You?re supposed to be around to play bad cop when Penny brings a crush home for the first time. You?re supposed to keep me company with card games and bad TV marathons when she leaves for college. You?re supposed to be around to vote for Penny to become president because you know she?s such a control freak already that she won?t be happy until she?s ruling the country. God knows she?ll sell her soul to take over the whole world, and you?re supposed to be there to help me stop her from making Faustian deals.?
"The world isn?t the safest place ever, we know that because of Christian and everyone else dying on the daily. But I should?ve shown you some risks are worth it.?
MATEO WAS HERE AND LIDIA WAS BY HIS SIDE, AS ALWAYS.
"Lidia will keep Mateo alive the only way she can."
"Mommy," Penny says. This one word says everything to Lidia - fall apart, but piece herself back together. If not for herself, for her daughter.
MR. TORREZ
"I'm sure you're really proud of him and you knew he had it in him all along. I've only known him for a day and I'm really proud of him too. I got to watch him grow up into the person he always wanted to be." (rufus)
Thank you for everything, Dad.
I'll be brave, and I'll be okay.
I love you from here to there.
Mateo
Mr. Torrez,
I'm Rufus Emeterio. I was Mateo's Last Friend. He was mad brave on his End Day.
I took photos all day on Instagram. You gotta see how he lived. My username is @RufusonPluto. I'm really happy your son reached out to me on what could've been the worst day ever.
Sorry for your loss,
Rufus (9/5/17)
"I hope you don't mind
I hope you don't mind
That I put down in the words
How wonderful life is while you're in the world"
-Your song, by Elton John